Culture or Coincidence?

Sure we can look at who we are and where we live and say that we have a culture. This is more obvious as we look at how we live compared to other people living across the world. But have you ever thought that your own family has created its own culture that exists within the walls of your home? Why are we the way that we are and how did we come to be this way? Is this family culture passed down or unique to each individual family?

As I thought about the culture of my own family, I see some significant aspects that make us who we are. One is our faith and religion. Both of my parents came from families that were members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, so that faith, membership and belief is something that has been embedded into our family. Our religion was a priority in my parent's eyes and dictated how we lived our lives. This directly effected the kind of home I grew up in and in turn will effect the man I choose to marry one day.

Another aspect that defined my family culture was the value of work. My father grew up on a farm where he was taught to do his fair share of chores. He learned to work and do a job well done in order to help the family. This same work ethic has been passed down into my family. Although we did not grow up on a farm, we had chores to complete. I can remember several family work projects that included weeding the garden, cleaning the garage or painting the house. We also grew up with a family paper route that we were each expected to do our fair share to help with. I remember hating these work experiences in the moment, but now I look back on them with fondness because it made me who I am today and instilled in me a characteristic that I want my own family to have.

So is it culture or coincidence? What values are passed down and where do new values come from? What kind of culture will you create? I think that is the beauty of a family is that it can be rich with traditions passed down from generation to generation and at the same time be new and unique in how one family decides they want their family to be despite those who came before.

Why We Do What We Do

I once visited a home where hanging on their wall near their kitchen table was a sign that read: "Family Rules." It then proceeded to list things that their family did such as "say thank you" or "take turns." Have you ever thought why your family does what they do? Does every family have a similar sign that lists every rule that they follow?

This made me think about what rules governed my family as I grew up. There were rules that were known and spoken about such as "finish the food that is put on your plate" or "say thank you." But there were others "rules" that we lived by that were unspoken. For instance everyone in our family had a specific spot at the dinner table that they sat in each night, and although we all knew our spot, it was never a spoken rule that we had a spot and only sat in that spot.

Other rules that my family lived by truly shaped who we were as a family unit and what we stood for. One in particular that stands out to me is that we were not allowed to fight with each other. Now that is not to say that we never fought with each other growing up which is most definitely not the case, but it was not tolerated that we call each other names or have an argument go unresolved. We were expected to get along, love, and respect one another. I think more than anything this family rule helped us gain a deeper sibling bond that has allowed me to be able to  honestly and truly say that my siblings are my closest friends.  Another rule that sticks out in my mind is that we always said goodnight to each other. This may seem simple and insignificant, but it was something that we did each night that again made us a more unified family. When one of us was heading to bed we would simply go to each member of the family and say goodnight and I love you. This was a way for us to close the day showing that we cared and taught us to use the words I love you freely with those that we love and care most about in our lives.

So whether it was "Eat your vegetables" or "goodnight, I love you," I am grateful for the family rules that created the family I know and love today.

Did You Say 8??

Yes I did say 8! Many people have been surprised or even shocked when I say that I come from a family of 8 children. In today's world, yes this number can seem unrealistic and even crazy. But for me, it was my perfect world.

Yes the house is loud, to the point where something feels wrong when it is quiet. Yes the table, couches and cars are crowded and packed. And yes you may have to call "dibs" on anything that you want or hide it if you want it for yourself. But I would not have it any other way. Growing up in a large family shaped who I am today more than anything else.

On average, families today are having one to two children. We are seeing the trend of smaller families and this can be for a number of reasons, but to me it really puts my life and what I have into perspective. What if my parents had stopped at two, three or even four children?I wouldn't be here today. Although I know that not all families can be large, I am grateful for the sacrifice that my parents made to raise 8 children.

I believe more than anything that the decision to have children, when and how many is entirely up to a husband, wife and God. He knows all and therefore will tell us what His will is for us. I know that my childhood and family experience has instilled in me the desire to raise a large family because I want for my children what I was blessed to have.

Let Me Introduce Myself...

My name is Cherri Johns and I am a student at Brigham Young University Idaho. I am an Idaho girl through and through and have spent most of my life in this great state. I am a girly girl which means I love things like chocolate, nail polish, fashion, the color pink, and lip-gloss. I love to be creative and am particularly drawn to interior design. I also enjoy music, reading, cooking, and watching a good chick-flick.

But even more crucial to my identity is my family, and where I come from. I am number five out of eight children born to Stan and Lisa Johns. I have four sisters and three brothers and I can honestly say that my siblings are my closest friends in this world. I am also blessed to have seven nieces, three nephews, two brother-in-laws, and one sister-in-law who all help keep our family growing and changing. We are a big crowd and quite loud but I wouldn't live life any other way.

I am creating this blog to talk about what I believe to be one of my most prized possessions that I have in this life, and that is my family. I will talk about my experiences, thoughts, feelings, insights, memories, and ideals of not only my personal family, but the family unit in general. I believe something so wonderful and crucial to our happiness in life should be appreciated and advocated and that is exactly what I hope this blog will do.